In 2009 I went back to work after taking a year off work for maternity. It wasn’t the easiest decision giving the fact that I was still breastfeeding at the time and my son would refuse to drink the breast milk from a bottle (spoil, I tell ya!). Leaving him was tough at first but I was lucky enough to find someone sweet and caring to look after him while I went back to work. But this post is not about how I got over my attachment issues. It’s about the “Monster on the wall” something my good friend says will “free me”.
I met this friend while I was working as a customer representative for a cell phone company (joy). In 2011 the call center that I worked for was closed and we were all “let go”. A few of the people I worked with stayed in touch but most didn’t. Which I can understand. We all have lives outside of the workplace, and it’s not everyone that “stays in touch” after you clock out of work. But that friend did. Started out with texting, Facebooking, then reluctantly meeting for lunch dates. I say “reluctantly” because I can be such a hermit. I don’t really like going out for social reasons. But that friend is such a talker. You can’t be “shy” around him. You never run out of things to talk about. He can be a bit overwhelming at first, but if you stick around, you will appreciate his eccentric ways. He tells it to you like it is. He likes to “keep it real”. He’s also the one that told me about the “monster on the wall”.
One of the things he and I talk about is financial freedom. About 1 year ago we were talking about debts and money (our favorite subjects), and he asked me if I knew how much I owed. I tried to low ball it a bit but he said “NO, M! (He like to use my initial to “emphasize” his points). You have to KNOW your “monster” in order for you to be free from it. In this case, the “monster” is my debt.
Here’s a bit of history on how my monster came to be. In 2005 I was in the grocery store when I was “lured” by a free box of no-name chocolate chip cookies. All I had to do is sign my name in blood on the dotted line. OK not really. I was offered a free box of cookies and in exchanged all I had to do is fill out the credit card application. The truth is, in 2005 I was going to school and didn’t have a job nor did I have any kind credit to my name. So I figured, I would sign up for the card but wouldn’t be accepted BUT I would go home with a free box of cookies. But it didn’t quite work out that way. Next thing I knew I had a card under my name with over 5,000$ limit. To someone that never had a credit card before you can imagine how appealing it was to have so much MONEY! Which despite telling myself that it was, wasn’t free.
One credit card led to another, and then another, and before I knew it, I had created my own “monster.” It was scary and frustrating. Finally, I went to the bank and got a credit line and paid off all the credit cards. I felt free. I thought I was. Clearly, I was in denial!
Fast-forward to May 2013. I received a call from the bank wanting to talk about a few solutions for my current “monster” problem. I was pretty desperate at that point. I wanted a way out. I got a payment plan where I will be paying close to 328$ per month and in 5 years I will be done with paying off that loan.
About a week ago, my friend, had me join a site, where you can post your monster for other people to view. Sounds scary huh!? Well, it was. Yesterday he messaged me and “kindly” reminded me NOT to forget to post my “monster” up. So I did. And After looking at my “monster” right in the eye, I was…scared, then I was hopeful, and that hope turned into motivation to get rid of my monster once and for all. It won’t be easy, but I’m determined to come out of it all the winner.
So if you are like me, and you are not facing your monster, I invite you to put your monster on the wall. Take a pen and paper, calculate all the amount you owe and right it down so that you can know what your monster looks like. If you want, you can join the site and fill out an entry for this month, and in January when you update it again you can see if there’s been any changes. To those of you who doesn’t have any debts (I envy you), what are some tips you can share with us?
Here’s my monster! That’s a picture Tristan was kind enough to color for me.
|The “Monster” on the wall (click on the link to view my entry for the month)
Don’t forget to subscribe/follow my blog to see who will win this battle!